Not Enough Faith
When you feel like "I'm not enough"
Even faith the size of a mustard seed can change how you see the world. (cf. Lk. 17:5-10)
Have you ever felt like a fraud? Sometimes you look around and it seems like everyone else has it all figured out. Meanwhile, you sit in your dorm, and anxiety rises. You’re unsure what to do, but you’re certain you don’t know what you’re doing.
The feeling of “I’m not enough” is one of the most common experiences we all face. It’s frustrating because we don’t like feeling this way. But you know what? You are not alone.
Imposter syndrome affects 25-30% of high achievers. Seventy percent of adults experience this at some point in their lives. (cf. Psychology Today, “Imposter Syndrome”) The problem is that we can’t see into other people’s souls. Our perception of others barely scratches the surface. We imagine that everyone else knows what is going on and that they have their lives figured out. We assume we must be failures. We don’t know what’s happening. It feels like our life is a mess.
Changing our mindset is an effective way to overcome imposter syndrome. One of the most profound ways to change our mindset is to grow in faith. If imposter syndrome thrives on comparison, faith breaks the cycle. Faith shifts our gaze from others to God.
In today’s Gospel, the apostles say to Jesus: “Increase our faith” (Lk. 17:5). Faith begins when we recognize our needs and turn to God, relying on Him. The Catechism of the Catholic Church tells us that
“Faith is a personal act – the free response of the human person to the initiative of God who reveals himself” (Catechism of the Catholic Church, 166).
God wants to enter a relationship with us. This alone should shake us out of imposter syndrome. What you are in the eyes of God is what you are—neither more nor less. If God wants to have a personal relationship with you, you must be important. This is another gift that God gives through faith. Faith anchors us in deeper truths.
If I feel that “I’m not enough,” I should check to see if maybe we don’t have enough faith. Sometimes, we ask God to have more faith. Then, it surprises us that trials and doubts assail us. How are we going to grow unless we go deeper in our faith through overcoming obstacles? God allows trials not to break us but to strengthen us. Just like at the gym, you can’t grow stronger if you only ever lift the bar.
St. Vincent de Paul did heavy lifting to grow in faith. You have probably heard his name because of the charitable organization that bears his name. In 17th-century France, he dedicated himself to serving the poor. Beyond that, he also did much for the formation of the clergy. In 1610, he found out about a priest who was suffering tremendous temptations against faith. The saint begged God to give him the sufferings of his fellow priests, and he battled tremendous doubts for three years. God used these three years of suffering to purify him of the last vestiges of pride in his soul (cf. “Saint Vincent de Paul 1600-1614, A Psycho-spiritual Study”).
Like Vincent, we too face doubts and distractions, though ours may look less dramatic. For us, the test of faith often comes in ordinary choices. Every time we enter the church and pray to God, we are exercising our faith. There are so many other things to do. Sometimes, we even think there are more important things to do, whether that be studying, hanging out with friends, or doing our laundry. It sounds crazy when we say it out loud, but I am sure many of us have had moments when we have at least thought of missing Sunday Mass for something as mundane as doing laundry.
Make a conscious commitment this week to make room for God. Don’t let him lose out to moldy socks. You may feel like you’re not enough. But faith, even the size of a mustard seed, is enough – because God is enough.