I was recently at a family wedding, where there were many people and a lot of food. This led to the revival of one of our great family traditions: leftovers. One night, we had the rehearsal dinner, and on Saturday, the wedding reception. So, we had plenty of food in the refrigerator, and it was expected that each of us could serve ourselves from it for lunch. The challenge is that one member of the family is famous for being intolerant of leftovers. Without getting into whether or not that attitude is justified, it speaks to something we all feel: we want to be the primary beneficiary of great food and service, not a tangential afterthought. And yet, so often, we try to get away with giving God the leftovers.
A Woman in Need
Today’s Gospel features leftovers center stage. A Canaanite woman comes to Jesus, begging for help because a demon is tormenting her daughter. She is a foreigner, at least in relation to Jesus and the disciples. Because the truth is that they are the foreigners. They are in the region of Tyre and Sidon, which the Greeks referred to as Phoenicia. So, it makes sense that they meet a Syro-Phoenician woman, as Mark’s Gospel refers to her. It feels contradictory for the disciples to be so dismissive towards her as a foreigner and a Gentile, since they are the ones far from home.
What were the actions of the woman? She was full of concern and worry because of her daughter’s suffering. When she heard of the holy man coming to her town, she felt compelled to go to meet him. She begged him for help, only to be rebuffed. Rather than being offended or entitled, she begged once again, lowering herself even more. She placed no limits on what she would do for the good of her daughter. Jesus makes it clear that he does not consider her a primary beneficiary of his public ministry. He even goes so far as to compare her to a dog.
She takes up this title and refers to herself as a dog begging for scraps. The miracle happens. Although she was not a primary beneficiary, she would also benefit. Even the scraps of God are enough for us. His love and his gifts are so bountiful that even a little bit is more than we could ever possibly need. Then, Jesus seems to make a huge turn in his attitude. “Woman, great is your faith.” He praises her. It is unique praise, and interesting that Jesus only praises non-Israelites for faith throughout the Gospel. From suffering rejection, she becomes one of the beloved of God.
Jesus Begging for Our Love
Often, the situation seems reversed. It feels like it is Jesus who is begging for our attention. The other day, I ordered an Uber from the airport. The driver looked rather distraught, and I asked him how he was doing. He went on to share that his home country had just suffered an earthquake. His home was destroyed, and they had rescued his mother from the ruins. He was still trying to find his daughter. We spoke during the trip, and he shared that most of the time we don’t think much about God. It is only when we are thrown into a crisis that we truly turn to God.
Don’t give God the leftovers. So often, in confession, I hear about people not making the time every week to go to Mass. Perhaps they feel bad, and obviously some situations might make it impossible. But I feel that often the problem is that we are giving the leftovers to God. If we have time, if we have energy, and if it is very easy, we make time for God. But we often need to reverse our thinking if we are going to be consistent in our desire to live for God.
Figuring it Out
Before we get to the weekend, we should have a firm commitment to when and where we are going to Mass. Otherwise, it becomes too easy to miss. It can happen in other areas of our lives as well. If we do not set aside time for God, it never happens that we spend the time we feel we need in prayer. If, on the other hand, we set aside the first fifteen minutes of the day to read and reflect on the Gospel, it soon becomes a habit.
Don’t give God the leftovers. Give him the best time of your day and your week so that you are building a strong relationship with him. You would never ask someone on a date and then try to fit the person in between two more important appointments. Don’t do that with God. Give the best to God, and he will do the rest. The Canaanite woman came to Jesus with nothing but her need and faith, and discovered that even what seemed like scraps from God were abundant grace for her.
Thank you Fr. Sheehy.
Agreed. We can get into the (bad) habit of not strictly setting aside time for prayer. But to advance in the spiritual life, we really have to intentionally plan when we will pray, and stick to it.